Confessions of a Teenage Grown-up

Note from Ben: Welcome the latest contributor to St. Timmy Pro, Edward “Sora” Ortega. Is he the most talented of us all? Only time will tell. (But I think the answer’s probably yes.)

Screw permits.

Seriously.

They make those stupid tests to give you a god damn aneurysm. Its like you’re at the computer and its all “blah blah blah” and you’re like “oh, A” and it’s all “WRONG INCORRECT YOU’RE STUPID GTFO MY DMV” and you cant help but cry as you fail the test slowly yet surely. The damn test is designed specifically for the person. See, me, I get more nervous as I get things wrong. And the test was all like “WHATS THIS SIGN MEAN” and I’m like “YIELD” and it’s all “NOPE WRONG NOW YOU’RE GETTING SCARED HUH? HOW ABOUT THIS! IF YOU’RE ON A FOUR WAY INTERSECTION AND THERE’S ONE PERSON IN EACH LEFT HAND LANE AND SUPERMAN IS FLYING OVER THE CITY FIGHTING A METEOR, WHO HAS THE RIGHT OF WAY!!?!?!” AND I’M ALL “OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD”

Superman, of course.

BUT NOPE ITS THAT BLIND GUY THAT THEY DON’T EVEN TELL YOU ABOUT WHO RETRACTS HIS GOD DAMN CANE AND YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT MEAN “OH I’M STUPID AND WANTED YOU TO THINK I’M CROSSING ITS OK THOUGH GO” AND YOU’RE ALL *WAITING FOR HIM TO CROSS* LIKE A JACKASS AND THE TEST IS ALL “HAHA YOU’RE STUPID NOW I’M GONNA BUST OUT SOME CALCULUS ON YOUR WHITE ASS.

I hate permit tests.

Did I mention I got my permit?

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